Monday, May 03, 2010

dream a little dream

I've been inwardly lamenting lately the fact that I have fallen victim to the "I'm too busy to blog" monster. I have loads of pictures (I think still on the camera), I have stories every day that range from infuriating to fall-down hilarious, and I usually find it is a great stress reliever. But here are the usual thoughts that fill my day that I can only assume are less-than-interesting to anyone who might read this blog and that therefore prevent me from writing it down:

  • Just how much dealing with bodily fluids can a person handle before they go postal?
  • How can a little girl love the potty so much and want to use it at exhaustingly regular intervals throughout the day, but poop in her pants for 2 weeks straight? (Again with the bodily fluids. Oy.)
  • When is Mary Poppins going to show up and snap her fingers to clean my house and fold my laundry?
  • And how can such little people produce such grotesque amounts of laundry anyway?
  • With the amount of complaining that goes on during meals ("that's disgusting" or "i don't want to eat this") I sometimes wonder if it would be better for my sanity to invest in a lifetime supply of frozen meals? There would still be the same amount of complaining but at least I wouldn't have wasted any time on it.
  • And speaking of making meals for a family, why can't we live off of cookies, brownies, cupcakes or anything containing a main ingredient of chocolate? At least then we'd all enjoy eating dinner. And the leftovers.
  • How do other full-time moms exercise? Honestly, it is a mystery of epic proportions to me. Someone please enlighten me. I'm desperate to figure out some kind of work-out schedule.
  • I would really appreciate it if the person who is letting their dog take a dump on the grass outside the back of our house would pick it up afterward. It's a common area so let's just be respectful of us common folk who use it, k?
  • Wow, that's a lot of complaining. Don't I think about anything positive?
  • Well, probably not at this time of night, which is the only time I get for myself.
  • Maybe I should just go to bed so I can relax and feel refreshed in the morning.
  • I would also probably do better during the day if, besides exercise, I could have a nice, relaxing shower without it being interrupted by screaming, waking up the baby, fighting, breaking things, etc.
  • Speaking of which, I have a funny story...

I was telling my friend Lisa about a dream I had last night and realized it was too priceless not to share. In this dream I was driving around in my minivan with all of my kids. I kept driving to different houses, even some hotels, not sure what I was looking for but I would stop and try to get out but these obnoxious sheep were following us everywhere. They kept trying to squeeze their way into the car, or into the houses/hotels I was visiting. Finally, I drove into a neighborhood with a house that was some sort of B&B. And then it also finally clicked what I had been looking for...a shower! A quiet, relaxing shower with no noise, no interruptions or disturbances of any kind. So, of course, to achieve this sort of nirvana I had to leave the kids in the car (which apparently I was more than happy to do) and I made my way into this house. But there were those darn sheep following me. So I distracted them by throwing a ball one direction and running in the opposite direction for the door to my room. I made it in with only one sheep slipping in behind me but I wasn't finished yet. I jumped over that persistent sheep with tunnel vision for that bathroom door. Everything else blurred and I could see a sort of glow emanating from the room that was my goal. I nearly slammed my own hair in the door but that stubborn sheep bumped its nose on the outside of the door as I locked it shut and shouted in victory! I turned in triumph to my prize...a gleaming shower, nearly glowing with glory. I swear I could hear angels heralding the coming joy. A shower! A shower! It is all yours!!! Immediately I turned the faucets as hot as I could handle, filling the wonderful room with glorious, relaxing steam. I was ready to step into my new-found wonderland when, in the distance I heard... Bang! Bang! Bang! I wanted to cry. Someone was banging on the outside door to my room. Even though I couldn't see who it was, I knew that someone had found my kids unattended and they were coming to demand that I resume my parental duties. And right outside the bathroom that obnoxious sheep was pawing at the door like a puppy...

Of course what puts the icing on the cake is that I'd been asleep for less than an hour when I was woken from this very telling dream by, 1) my husband snoring, and 2) my baby crying. My analysis? Momma needs some "me" time. Or a vacation. Or a live-in nanny.

Or a sound-proof shower.

Preferably with lots of steam.


  1. Awesome dream, Erin! I have spent many showers with my hand gripping the door handle to keep out the three-year-old pounding on the door. It's usually my only five minutes of peace in a day. If you can call that peace. I'm so impressed that you can mother a new baby AND keep blogging. I'm going to get inspired and get back to my blog. I hope you had a wonderful birthday--I was thinking of you even if I wasn't on Facebook :) I love you so much, Cousin--why don't you sneak down to Mesa for a little "me" time...? or at least St. George...

  2. woo-hoo! sounds like a fabulous idea, heather! i would love to do another trip, let the kids spend some time outdoors hiking or something. i want my kids to have fun memories of st. george with their cousins like i do! maybe barrett & becca would be up for a visit too, after the baby comes!

  3. Hahahaha, I can so relate to all of that. That dream was hilarious. I wonder what it all means, besides that you needs some serious alone time.

  4. It does sound like you need some "me" time. I totally understand and can relate. I am listening to my cast baby crying right now as I sit reading and commenting on your blog... oh well, it was nice while it lasted!

  5. your so darling guess what they grow up and then leave home and all we can remember is how fun it was being a young mom, its weird!