Thursday, May 17, 2012

Courage & darn-near disbelief

One of my friends posted a status on Facebook that quoted a line from the movie We Bought A Zoo..."All you need is 20 seconds of insane courage, and I promise you something great will come of it."  I felt like a had a moment of insanity this past week which originally didn't feel like courage, just pure insanity.  However, something awesome came from it so whether it's insanity or courage, I'll take what I can get.

Last week I randomly discovered something called the Utah Symphony Chorus.  I never knew such a wonderful thing  even existed!  Apparently they sing a handful of times throughout the year with the Utah Symphony at...that's right, ABRAVANEL HALL!!!!!  Sorry, I had to shout that cause it's so exciting.  I thought it would be wonderfully fulfilling and exciting and pure awesome to be part of something like that and, as luck would have it, they were holding auditions this week.  So I signed up.  I told a few people I felt like Monica from 'Friends' when she had her identity stolen and ended up confronting her fears and taking a tap dance class when she had NO idea what she was doing...and as she waved her arms around erratically, being told she was "doing it wrong" she replied enthusiastically, "at least I'm doing it!!!"  I imagined myself a little like that.

So I got some tips from my awesome voice coach neighbor about auditioning and yesterday loaded the kids up in the car so I could drop them at Michael's work while I went to sing my heart out.  If I felt out of my league before it only increased a hundred-fold while I was waiting my turn and listened to other singers warming up.  These were majorly trained voices, people who could sing opera and sing it really well.  It made me feel about 12 years old.  But I decided to laugh it off and chalk it up to good experience and went in my audition with a big smile.  I told the auditioner that I felt out of my league but that I would LOVE to be in this chorus and what a wonderful opportunity it would be, then I did my thing and left feeling like I probably wouldn't make it because of the stiff competition but that I had done really well.  Yay for me.

You could have knocked me over with a feather when I got an email from them tonight saying "Congratulations, your audition was successful..." HUh?  Were you talking to me?  Seriously?!??  So apparently I get to sing with the Utah symphony.  In Abravanel Hall, a place I have revered since I was a very small person in awe of the gold and chandeliers and sounds of that amazing place.  And all because I had a few moments of courage.  What if I hadn't auditioned?  I never would have known.  Go seize the day!  I hope something great will come out of it for you.  

Sunday, May 13, 2012

Mothers with heavy hearts

I am going to go out on a limb here and assume something for all parents.  It's a big assumption but I bet I'm pretty close.  I'm going to assume that, regardless of individual fears as we grow up (being afraid of the dark or afraid of bears or afraid of rejection), once someone becomes a parent there is ONE single, simple fear that shoots to the top of the list--losing a child.  I can't imagine a more terrifying thought to myself and for some reason that thought occurred to me tonight at the end of a wonderful, happy, satisfying Mothers Day.  I wanted to send out a tribute to all mothers (fathers too, actually) who have lost a child and who are most likely reminded of that event on this particular day.  I can't even begin to imagine how difficult something like that must be, how heart-breaking it must feel at times, I can only offer my heart in sympathy and my hope that you can see them again someday.  So, on what for some will be a bittersweet day, I wish a happy mother's day to those who've loved and lost.  Our thoughts are with you.